Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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