just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
