Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
