Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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