I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
