Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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