I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize