Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
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