Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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