so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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