Grow some girl-balls and come out already
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
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