so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
