Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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