He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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