Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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