Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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