Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
