So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
