a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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