its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
