One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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