He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Randomize