carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
