He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize