I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
