Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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