Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize