Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize