Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You made out with two different species that night
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
