we're chasing vodka with high fives
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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