Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Randomize
