Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
