Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
