Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Church boner. Awkwardddd

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(601): View more from Mississippi

"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move

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(559): View more from California

I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper

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(530): View more from California

And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?

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(210): View more from Texas

remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues

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(360): View more from Washington

My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size

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(860): View more from Connecticut

What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday

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