Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
