if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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