She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
