what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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