I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
