So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
