I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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