Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
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