Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
