Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
