i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
