but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
