Where are you?
In a non slutty way
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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