I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
