oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
