party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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