No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
found the other keg... it's in the tree
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
