Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
